| FINALLY WAT! |
[Mar. 22nd, 2011|02:48 am] |
So things can be shit because they're shit and shit becomes more shit and shit equals shit so nothing can magically come from it and it can not be transformed into something wonderful. That is my past. I'm leaving that "shit" in the waste basket. I will now attempt to getting myself on track.
Recently, I was very upset, moody, and cut off from some things that I've always had. I got caught up in all the things that are wrong when I was foolish enough to try to fix everything at once. The only thing that's changed as of recent is I got my flow for art back.
Life is now actually worth living because if I can't draw then I am literally nothing in this world. Not a human being with feelings and emotions, Love and Hate, but a husk like the outer crust of a peanut.
I have been lost and now that I found my metaphorical "peanut" goodness again hidden under the bed, so to speak, I am reborn. Lord knows for how long but it has happened!
Translation: At least one Houou comic page every month will be uploaded come hell or high water!!! That is all. |
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| C'est La merde |
[Nov. 15th, 2006|02:35 pm] |
ummmm...I'm thinking about picking up Houou again because there are a few things that need to be changed. I'm not going to partake in a total revamp but I'm updating the existing pages with a challange to the old and a litle bit for a new. I won't say much right now because I don't know how much time I have and how much crap is comming down the poop shoot at me. I do have plans for new pages and they'll probably all proceed now to be digital. This is mostly a thought because things aren't going very fast as it is and I'm not going to get a scanner when I have a pretty little tablet at the moment*bobs to Roxette*.
Anyway, looking for a place to stay and it's hard but yeah. Things are ok now but they would get worse. I hope they won't but they have and come and gone as far as threats go. I"m in store for some revamping of my own here soon.
Anyway, talk to you all soon and hopefully with some new pages and more frequent updates. |
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| funny quizes and Houou News |
[Aug. 31st, 2005|01:29 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  amused | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Untitled-Simple Plan | ] |
Congratulations! You're destined to be the one love
of Folken la Cour de Fanel. Tall, handsome,
with those killer black wings, he's a soulfully
tragic man with a brooding personality and a
harsh shell of emotionlessness surrounding his
loneliness. Maybe you're the one to bring him
out of his shell.....*winkwink*
Who Is Your Destined Escaflowne Soul Mate?
brought to you by Quizilla
Von is severely fuckable...I would do him*grin*
Well done! You've snagged Van Slanzer de Fanel, the
young King of Fanelia! A white-winged angel
with a heart of gold, this headstrong, stubborn
yong man is quite a catch! Lets hope you can
handle him....^_-
Who Is Your Destined Escaflowne Soul Mate?
brought to you by Quizilla
Guess who I am^^
What Escaflowne Character Are You?
Hosted by theOtaku.com: Anime. Done right.
Ok I've had too much fun for today
For Houou peoples, I have gone back on schedule for a short time and I'm not sure if it'll be like that for a while or not. The 14th, 30th, and 15th of October will have updates. After that, it all depends on how busy I am. I'm having a bit of an artist block so it might go back on a short and temporary Hiatus for a while after 15th of October. Bare with me^^;
Thank you and see you all very soon,
-MEL |
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| I'm in the rant mood everyone^^ |
[Dec. 11th, 2004|12:54 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  cranky | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Eric Clapton Unplugged | ] |
oh yes...my life sucks balls
Some explainations are in order:
1>I'm plugged up the ass with homework from school so I can't even shit sideways let alone look anywhere else but forward at the homework.
2>The school has recently put a firewall on the all the computers in the school so that I can't get to DA or Livejournal sucessfully.
3>The Librarian in the school has a anal retentivity problem and always has the library quarenteened off from anyone getting in to use the computers at any time.
4>I don't have internet any longer at my house because it was a little too distracting.
5>I can never have internet at my house because the computer I had for it was fried in a random electric storm that shot a bolt of lightning through it just to spite us(that will be the 18,000 time that I've lost all my artwork and stuff and no one is hear to fix the stupid thing).
6>My mom has such bad credit that I'll never have the hopes of getting a better computer or Laptop.
7>The computer I'm working off of now is so slow and old that it could never handle any internet service let alone a new program to be downloaded onto it.
8>I have a huge paper due in two days and it has to be about 7 pages long but without the internet at my fingertips, It most likely won't get done and it's worth a huge portion of my final grade in English.
9>OWC library has all my research information but is so far away from my house I have to pay a toll bridge fee everytime I wanna go there.
10>OWC Library is only open on Saturdays from 9:45 to 1:00pm.
11>My boyfriend's car that was taking me to OWC is in the shop and has no chance of getting out of there anytime soon.
12>Anyone that could take me(I don't have a driver's license because we don't have a car I can use or have the ability to pay for insurence on my ass) doesn't want to go because they have internet at their house.
So here I am, fighting through the Destin trafic(through 2 hours behind the santa float) to make it to a Library that has internet only to find out that it's out of my district and will cost my mom $35 dollars to get a membership with. Tell me I don't have a reason to live anymore?
As for Houou...Everytime I go to draw(not only do I have homework up my ass) I don't have the energy or talent to complete the next page. Plus I'm always tired and I just suck at art period. However, with christmas break right around the corner, I hope to sucessfully sit down and finish some pages for the comic.
Sorry for the long wait...I can't stand imperfection. |
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| rage isn't fun kiddies |
[Oct. 18th, 2004|10:35 am] |
OMG!!
With that out of the way, I will explain. I continue to have no internet at my house and it kind of sucks but I'm kind of happy I don't have it because it makes me slack off from doing my homework and reading and drawing and yeah! My AP English teacher would be proud of my long sentences*stabs herself in the eye with a pencil* Anyways, that really isn't what's chapping my ass. What really is chapping my ass is this:
I want a laptop!
That's the first conflict. Second:
I have no money
Third conflict:
It costs at least +2 clams(thousand dollars)
Fourth conflict:
I don't make but 20 dollars(at the worse) for babysitting at a time
Fifth conflict:
The one I have had my eye on for at least a year is out of stock at all stores in this area and can't be ordered
Sixth conflict:
The store is trying to sell me the upgraded version for the same price(1800) to which it needs all these touch ups to become as kick ass as the one I had my eye on in the first place for the same price.
Seventh conflict:
To spiff up the upgraded version it will cost about as much as the super-amazing-uber-kick-ass one that I can't afford(2500).
Eighth conflict:
The store doesn't have layaway but has a credit card system that doesn't help me any because my mom has bad credit.
Ninth conflict:
I have eight months to get up enough money to pay for it because I'm being kicked out of the country at that time.
Tenth conflict:
My LIFE SUCKS!!!
End rant- |
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| quick update for houou'ers... |
[Aug. 19th, 2004|10:22 am] |
This is just a quick little journal to people who actually read my comic. My computer at home has been fried by lightning a couple weeks ago. That means simply, the comic will not go up until that gets fixed. If time presses on too far I might put the comic on hiatus because school has started and I'm REALLY busy. I don't know...depends. I have half of the page done but it might not go up for a while.
I know you must hate me for saying it but I'm just about ready to keel from all the homework and hard work I have to do this year. I'm really sorry</3 |
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| To Houou'ers |
[Aug. 1st, 2004|02:36 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  aiiiii | ] |
| [ | music |
| | anastasia-on a journey to the past | ] |
Ok, so now it's 2:30 in the morning(stomping grounds time usually for me) and I have the biggest headache, imaginable. This whole 'headache' is most likely a burn out signal of being a perfectionist too many years because I've spent a good four or more hours working on the panels for the new page and come to no avail. I've borrowed a camera to study head tilts and possitions to model off only to realise anime doesn't really have realism in it, at least not to the last detail...like I was working...
Oi...
Anyways, I am procrastinating as usual and the comic will be put up in a couple days or so. I have babysitting later on in the day(kind of odd to say that when it's dark out still ><;) so depending on how good they are...I might get it done. I'll try before I go but to tell you what's been holding me up...it's my planning. For the first page, I was really lucky because I had a clear view in my head how the panels would be arranged, how many, and what angle they'd show. It was pure luck on my part it came out so well because I don't draw scenery often, let alone winter blizzards. Also, I had been doing some research on the internet to help and I couldn't find a lick of it. I was also looking into photography books at the bookstore...nothing...looked into manga...nothing...I was on my own so I used my memory from many years ago as a kid playing in the snow and got something that was half way decent. I'm happy with it but the second page is giving my a very hard time. I've been trying to decide what is "too" slow and what is "too" fast for manga and it's driving me crazy because I can't draw folds very well, I have to scrap the folding tent scene a bit and fast forward. I had planned to have this one panel of Yarlo looking out saddened and it turned out in the end(after four times of trying)shitty beyond belief so I'm going to cut that panel out all together. Makes me sad because it adds to the whole thing but I just can't do it. So now, I figured I work a bit off of what I'd planned but do it with a twist, something I got as a brainstorm when I was working frustrated over the paper tonight. I'll also put up my planning page on DA soon but not until the page is up on keenspace. So a couple days and everything will be back, I hope.
Also, I've not been able to sleep at night because of my fear of the return to High School and a terrible schedule that awaits, next year. It might mean the comic going on Hiatus for a while, I dunno. Usually I get so caught up in homework, it takes away all my muse to work on anything else. I hate it but it's going to get worse, I assure you. Back to deadlines and projects I'm not interested in and procrastination beyond belief. Chapter one in Houou is what has made the delays half a month because of all the scenery that will be comming up. As soon as we're past the whole thing, I might put the updates sooner like every two weeks or once a week...I can't be certain.
Creative processes and good art always come in the least expected times and least stressful situations.
Summer's been great and I really hate to see it go.
Le sigh...I know no one really cares, they just want me to put out a page..you wait all this time and have things late...oi I know that anger that comes from something being late...I've been through it first hand. But this isn't something you read in an American newpaper everyday or every sunday in color. This is a story of the turning of prescheduled lives into free will...it's not meant to make you laugh every week and lift your spirits...it's as serious a story as something you'd read in a novel with words, only instead of imagining the places from the vague descriptions, you see the world through the eyes of someone who's actually been there almost everyday for the past four years. Something beautiful and unique...it takes time to get it right, I'm afraid and I don't believe there is many mangaka artists, except maybe clamp or the creator of "saiyuki", that undertake such a beautiful atmosphere and lush, fantasy setting as Houou. Sure I could probably put the same characters in unimainative clothes and put them in a sitcom like atmosphere for your viewing pleasure but then I'd be no better than the whore at the mall that does charactures for money of tourists who all look the same. Sure what the hell, right?
I'm really sorry but the answer is no...I have a lot of people I look up to in the mangaka business that aren't pros and who are and I see hope for my story that has burned brightly within me for so long, I couldn't stand to kill it off. I've tried to start it before and maybe I should have waited until I had at least chapter one done to start but I figured I should have the full force of deadlines on my from day one. I guess I'm just a huge perfectionist and I'm sorry to all...
_.End rant._
Page will be up this week or I'm giving upX3 |
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| yay more shitty poetry and prose |
[Jul. 29th, 2004|03:39 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | yayness | ] |
| [ | music |
| | I miss you- Blink 182 | ] |
this one is dedicated to my Emoutochan^^ She writes so beautifully and puts up with me talking so much^^;
The Brotherhood
Calling to the trees, the living of the forest
Above death that escapes occassionally with a roar that reverberates upon the evergreens.
Call it home because everything’s there for them.
The brothers, 12 counted.
They don’t play by the rules and they each stick to their own.
A perfectly proportioned individual.
Jewlike in appearance, the perfect organism,
Living off the land like what was always planned.
They live in freedom and own nothing but what they can claim for themselves.
They are seen as evil in their wicked existance and live like theives,
Completely misunderstood.
Only they know what they are and only they can smell, see, and taste the life the earth provides them.
Boundless spirits, corralled into sleek ebony caskets
The sky is their limit but not the end.
They mornfully reflect together when the weather is below and feed one another when other takes ill.
Dips and dives, loops and landings,
They often outdo that of human aerobatics.
The sad day when they fall or miscalculate,
The wing, pulled back obscurely, inflicting as much pain as feisibly endured.
One seeks help from the other life in the area,
Only to bravely die upon a steel table, the cold seringe their last encounter,
The last battle fought.
They morn again, 11 in count this time
Only to understand man had his hand in playing god again.
-MEL |
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| ON THE NEW HOUOU PAGE... |
[Jul. 18th, 2004|09:53 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | crazy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | ordinary day-vanessa carlton | ] |
Ok peoples(and anyone that's actually interested in finding out 'What the fuck' is up with the new page),I must clarify one huge misunderstanding that I'm sure will be in most people's minds. "WTF is that thing in the first panel?" Well, since Unmei Sekai; the planet or world that Houou's story takes place on, is a planet under no influence of planet earth and[earth]formally doesn't exist, if you just wanna know the truth. So, in the light of this revelation you must say to yourself, "If it's a world nothing like earth, why would it have a standard tent in it?" That's what a logical, normal person would ask. So, if I had drawn a normal tent, out in the middle of the tundra(yes that is a snow blizzard on a tundra>3 evil ne?) ;known as Amenstrad(ah-mehn-straade); it would have raised observations and annoying questions later.
To find out more about this "Tent", go to the gallery on the site or click here
Yay for completion...next page is in serious jeopardy of being late as well...the creative juices, you know...
chill and enjoy
-MEL |
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| interesting quiz and a personal update... |
[Jul. 16th, 2004|10:46 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | chipper | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Titanic orchastration piece-"?New Hope?" | ] |
With that now aside>3 On with news...
For Houou'ers, the new comic page should be done soon, that's all I can really promise at this point in time. I'm also working on my "secret" character pages for Houou and am going to decorate with chibis in "living" cg color. That's all I really have to say for now to Houou'ers. Faze out now if you're not interested in hearing the stupid things I have to exclaim about me life...Thanks for all the suport and reading my comic^^
For everyone else, My mom just got her paycheck in so that means "yayness" as I wiggle a little dance. Me and mom went shopping today and I picked up this cool little ponch/shawl that's a dark pink. It's pretty but it was on the expensive side@@; For me anyways>3 We also went to the movies and seen I, Robot which turned out everything I'd imagined it would be. I don't think I've been impressed much with movies since I went to see Chronicles of Riddick and before that the last Lord of the Rings installment. Movies have always been going down hill but I still keep going to the odd one or two that looks good. In a couple weeks I'll go see Harold and Kumar because it looks hilarious. I'm not interested in Spider man because of the horrible main actor...although Doctor Ock looks well protrayed, it's not enough to salvage the movie for me...plus that bitch gets on my nerves, she's so see through with her less than terrible talents as an actress. Mary Jane was really attractive and spiderman was just as good looking, how they dug up these shit faced actors and actresses is beyond me. Anyways, my movie was fine but it was packed because it was the first night at the rave. Heath and I practiced at our Soul Calibur skills on the arcade version before getting there to the movie theatre a little late but there were a lot of previews. Cellular looks interesting and The Village looks promising but I'll think about it when the time comes around. Anyways, after my mom checked for dad at Starbucks and we had to leave. I got a coffee and then headed off to the bookstore to unexpectedly purchase Charles Darwin's book on Natural Selection, his best work reprinted. I'm happy that I'll have something really challenging to read but I should also read my Reds book too before the summer's over with. I've got my eye on Grim fairy tales next but it'll be a while till a finish Reds, a +600 page book on the evolution of Communism in the United States, and now Charles Darwin's book which looks a bit hefty as well. Also I'm really really stoked because I stopped in at ?Game Spot?(local and nation wide seller of most video games) to find a copy of Soul Calibur 2 to find to my pleasure that they had marked it down to $20. That's a buy worth taking them up on. It is at least a year old now but still that's a great price for any playstation 2 game. Walmart was too busy bringing in shit games to stock it anymore but I'd rather have it at Game spot for 20 then at Walmart for god knows what price. I tried to go after the movie to pick it up there but it was closed so I was promised tomorrow that I might be able to get it. So I'm real happy about everything as life stands. Also, my mom said she'd like to go to Osaka(really awesome japanese resturant here) for supper one night but I'm not sure when right yet. Also I'm working on a piece now that has my tied up because it has to have a tremendous amount of detail for the background of flowers to look right. And that's only the drawing/inking stage; there will also be a big thing with the coloring so I'll be up for a while on that one. But, the comic page comes first so I'm gonna go finish that now so I can have room for my other drawing.
For alida specifically, I need to tell you something really important so I'll write that in a seperate journal...keep an eye out.
I'm happy*does a dance*>3 |
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mel_dungeon's journal
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